How Morning Chili Could Be Ruining Your Life

morning chili

(This post is an adapted version of one I recently posted to Appalachian Trials.  If you prefer the PG version I encourage you to head there.  If not, you’ve come to the right fucking place.)

Yesterday, I woke up to a crockpot full of steamy-hot, delicious grass-fed beef and bison chili.  The night before, I dedicated an hour to chopping and dicing onions, garlic, peppers, and jalapenos- then browning these veggies plus meat, mixing it with my soaked and sprouted black beans, tomatoes, and homemade bone broth.  I then set this factory of olfactory orgasmic matter to cook for 10-hours overnight.

Here’s a question- so the fuck what?

Good question.  Stay with me here.

My normal morning routine of late has me drinking a half liter of water followed by a tall cup of coffee blended with butter and coconut oil (a concoction called Bulletproof Coffee– it’s delicious, trust me).  This routine has served me well for two reasons: 1) it’s a good alternative to breakfast since I almost never wake up hungry and 2) Bulletproof Coffee = (crack + adderall) – meth jitters.  This creamy morning goodness gives me laser-sharp focus for the better part of 6 hours without the crash.  My productivity of late has been astronomical, allowing me to get more done in a shorter amount of time.

Can you guess what happened when I walked into the kitchen and was immediately punched in the face with the sight and smell of a week’s supply of chili?  You guessed it.  I gave it a taste test.  The taste test turned into manufactured hunger followed by an extra large serving of tortilla-less huevos rancheros.

Again- So. The. Fuck. What?

Finally: the point.

My day’s productivity suffered as a result.  Not only was I not even hungry for breakfast, but I inhaled a pregnant panda’s portion of this meal resulting in all of my brain blood flowing to my fat, stupid stomach.  I could blame my lack of willpower, but willpower requires a thinking brain, something I do not have prior to ingesting caffeine.  The real fault lies with pragmatic Zach- the Zach that is all too aware of the importance of stimulus presentation.  My fate was sealed the minute I made the decision to let a bathtub full of chili be the first thing to greet me in the morning.  I set the stage for a less than productive day.

This error in a single serving (so to speak) is not a huge deal.  After all, my day started with a facegasm and I was able to put in a couple extra hours that night to compensate.  Leaving a delicious, ready-to-eat meal on the counter first thing in the morning every day, however, is how bad habits happen.  I have made a conscious decision to prioritize productivity, I need to create an environment that supports this, and with morning chili I failed myself.

Morning Chili and Kicking Life’s Ass

What is it that you’re prioritizing?

Are you trying to lose weight?  

If so are you staying up late to binge watch House of Cards or are you sending yourself reminders to power down by 9pm so you can get to the gym before work in the morning?  Is a jar of cookie butter staring at you every time you open the cupboard or have you donated all your temptations to friends?  Have you constructed a set of rules for yourself (e.g. The 4-Hour Body) or are you going wrestle your willpower every time hunger strikes.

Are you trying to increase your productivity?

Are you working 8-5, juggling the barrage of incoming requests (emails, texts, Facebook notifications), or are you consciously constructing a series of tasks ordered from most important to least, closing out all distractions, and working until completion?  Upon waking, are you reaching for your phone or setting aside 10 minutes to meditate?  Are you making a plan (like this) to improve your efficacy or are you just going to throw more hours of your day to an inefficient system?

Are you trying to kick life’s ass or are you leaving delicious morning chili on the counter?

lead image: via

  • Diana

    This is a serious problem with slow cooking overnight!