A Weakened Weekend

zach davis 3 day fast

Once every couple of years, I voluntarily subject myself to an act of controlled starvation, more commonly referred to as fasting.  Many fast to lose weight (even though science says it’s counterproductive).   Some do it to cleanse their systems – eliminating deep seeded toxins in hopes of establishing a fresh sense of vitality.  Others do it for religious purposes.

For me, it’s none of the above.

I fast when I sense myself slipping into a system of routines.  Most days, I have zero conscious thoughts or real observations by the time lunch rolls around.  I’ve programmed myself to work off a checklist, something we all do to different extents, but I can sense mine approaching robot.  As a result, the creative portions of my brain begin to fade.  Personally, I’ve found fasting to be the most effective method to shake off that layer of brain dust.

In prior fasts, I’ve felt as though my clarity of thought was as clear as ever.  However, I never set aside time to document anything.  Leaving retrospection out of the equation, it’s very possible that sense of clarity was purely a mistaken hallucination.  This time, I will block off some time to write.  If anything seems relevant enough to share, you can find it here.

Starting Friday (tomorrow) morning to Monday morning, food will not be happening to me.


Post Fast Summary

I decided  not to dedicate a separate post to the aftermath of the fast because there’s nothing particularly interesting enough to share other than a few notes on my physical experience with it.  Proceed at your own risk (esp with the last bullet).

If I had to draw a theme out of what transpired over the last three days I’d call it, “What I’d Do Differently

And the list would include:

  • DO NOT fast when scheduled to work. Forcing your mind to remain active when attempting a restful process is a pretty miserable combination.  Not to mention, eating is in large part a byproduct of stress (at least for me).    Listening to your co-workers talk about food all afternoon is enough to make cardboard look like a filet mignon.
  • DO NOT put yourself in social situations.  Both at work and away, people often thought I was in a bad mood.  They were right, but that perception was intensified because in the midst of a fast, not only does social interaction require energy that you probably don’t have, but it’s much more pleasant to observe than to participate.  My lack of communication gave the impression that I was a hatestorm with legs.  Not true guys, but I could see why it would seem that way.  Next time (if there is a next time) I will practice my fast where no one goes (i.e. the mountains or a Marlins game).
  • DO expect copious amounts of pain.  I have no idea why, but the last 6 hours of the fast through all of today, my legs feel like they’re constantly being strangled.  Honestly the discomfort is so bad I can now say with a straight face that I know what it feels like to birth a child.  😐  After a little research, the only plausible explanation is that the pain is a concentration of toxins trapped inside of my body.  To paint the picture a little more bluntly, my legs are basically giant go-gurt tubes of poison.  I don’t know if this is a good thing or a bad thing but it certainly is a disgusting thing.  Sorry to anyone who was planning on eating in the next hour or so.

In conclusion: fast only if you have time off, you’re capable to take a few days away from society, and don’t mind the feeling of an invisible leg boa constrictor.

Why You Need To Move To San Diego

why move to san diego

In my previous post, I laid out the how to portion of my “moving to San Diego” series.  The following will serve as the “why”. The previous post also included a sense of humility and an understanding that San Diego is not a one-size-fit-all city.  This post will be having none of that.

If forced to describe the Good Badger in 3 words, the general consensus would undoubtedly arrive at: noble, nimble, and ninjitsu (click that).  I bring this up simply to point out that “embellishing” is not one of those terms.  I pride myself in being a fact-spewing truthbot. So, when I make a claim such as, “San Diego makes every other city in the Universe look like Detroit”, you know that it’s as good as encyclopedic.

Likely you’re already aware that San Diego has great weather, nice beaches, good looking people, etc.  I’m not here to restate the obvious.  Instead the below will serve as 3 (and a half)  “outside the box” reasons

Why You Need To Move To San Diego

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The Ultimate Collection of Hilarious News Bloopers

The Ultimate Collection of Hilarious News Bloopers

Which one of the following two statements are correct?

  1. News Bloopers Are Hilarious
  2. My Ringtone Is Justin Bieber

Trick question. They’re both true.

Newscasters are people that we look to for an unbiased narrative about what’s happening in the world around us. In our heads, they may as well be information spewing robots (Tom Brokaw). When they do anything that reveals that they’re still highly fallible creatures, i.e. make reference to the size of their johnson (see: below), the hilarity effect is multiplied.

I now present to you, my favorite local news bloopers. If there’s anything that I left out, please, either send me an e-mail or drop a comment below. Enjoy…

Warning– Potty Mouth Language may ensue.

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The Good Badger Guide to Becoming A Better Internet Music Adoption and Discovering Machine

I am music obsessed.

I know, everyone loves music, but my observations tell me that the majority of people have a healthy relationship with it.

Not me.  It dominates my life.

At work, many know me as  “that guy who beatboxes down the hallway”.  The rest likely know me as “that guy who annoyingly beatboxes down the hallway.” Read more

Extra Large Enablers

Extra Large Enablers T Shirt Tag

Scene: While at the grocery store, rummaging through the produce section like I know what a good cantaloupe looks like (I don’t), my afternoon is instantly ruined by the venomous noise of a screaming toddler.  It’s an unmistakable combination of unreasonable complaining with pure hysteria.  Words, screaming, and dry heave crying are blended together like it was the latest offering from Jamba Juice.


Of course by the end of this song, Mom is so suicidal that she’ll grant Screamy whatever material object will allow her 12 seconds of escape from the constant torment of raising a child.  Screamy gets the robot dinosaur boat DVD (i have no idea what kids like), mommy gets a little bit of quiet, and The Good Badger gets livid. Read more

The Louis C.K. Case Study

Louis C.K.

Louis C.K.

Warning: if you don’t tolerate occasionally offensive, consistently crude humor very well, skip the links on this post.

Louis C.K. is a comedian that you may not be familiar with.  On a scale from 1-10, his popularity is roughly a 7.5 (and on the rise).  He’s had an hour long special on HBO, another on Showtime, an HBO sitcom (that was canceled after one season), a new series about to debut on FX, and the first ever stand-up special accepted by Sundance.  Not too shabby.

I first fell upon Louis C.K.’s stand up during his hour long special on HBO.  It was nothing short of magical.

An average stand up routine will typically rouse a couple of chuckles, but I’m onto the next channel within the first few minutes.  A good stand up routine will keep my attention throughout the entire performance, with consistent levels of laughter.  During Louis C.K.’s stand up, I developed a laughter induced hernia, 1-hour of comedy turned into 3 hours of total watch time due to constant rewinding from residual laughter drowning out proceeding jokes, and several pieces of furniture were destroyed in the process (I’m a violent laugher). Read more

New Tiger Woods Nike Ad

Here’s the new Tiger Woods Nike Ad:

The first thing that came to my head…. “Tiger, you deliberately disobeyed me”.  Does this:

1) Begin to clear the dirt from his image by being up front and honest


2) Seem like a desperate plea for sympathy to sit in front of a camera intentionally making a sad face for 20 seconds?

What do you think?

Breaking News: How The Good Badger Is Going To Become A Great Site

On a fairly regular basis I get fan e-mail about people giving constructive criticism for ways to improve the site.

Please stop posting.  – Josh in IA

I found your site through and can honestly say this is the worst thing that has happened to me all day.  Tessa in NY

I want to punch you in the adams apple.  – Laura in WI

Thanks for the feedback guys.  I’ve taken your suggestions for improvement to heart and have outlined an 8 step program for how I plan to finally make this site enjoyable.  I’m especially excited for step 6… Read more

Cats: Man’s Best (Invisible) Friend

Why Cat’s are Glorified Invisible Friends

Growing up, I had the best friend any little boy could ask for.  His name was Wesley, and he was awesome.  Wesley and I were inseparable.  When I would play Nintendo, Wesley was there.  When I would play Sega, Wesley was there.  When I would play Gameboy, Wesley was there.  I’m not sure if it’s because I was so great or because he was such a good friend, but I would always win.  It didn’t matter what the game was, he always seemed to come up short in the end.  See, when I lose, I’m a really poor sport.  I tend to flip the monopoly board, accuse the other person of cheating, deal a passive aggressive insult, and storm away.  Not Wesley.  Usually after losing, he would go out of his way to compliment me, even if it wasn’t relevant to the situation.  “Good job winning in basketball, you’re really handsome”, “It’s hard to beat you in Donkey Kong because you’re a genius” or, “Oh man, you beat me in a dead sprint up the stairs again, you should be president.”  Wesley and I were total BFFs.

Then one day, everything changed…. Read more